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Empty Nest? Where Do You Go From There?
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Mar 4, 2021
Do you have an empty nest? Mel Greenberg joins us to talk about her book Running With Our Eyes Closed. What happens after the nest empties? Pick up a copy of her book here: https://amzn.to/3aM16ev A Southern California native, Mel is a best-selling author and publisher. A proud alumna of the University of Maryland, she worked as a copywriter and producer in radio and television in Washington D.C. before heading back to the west coast. Mel’s debut novel, Running with Our Eyes Closed, explores marriage, life and love after the nest empties. And she’ll be the first to tell you that moving forward - from then to now has been a wildly unexpected and beautiful journey. 📌 Subscribe to my YouTube Channel: https://YouTube.com/cgmusc Check out more shows here: http://carenglasser.tv Follow us on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/carenglasser Follow us on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/carenglasserlive Follow us on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/carenglasser Visit The Super Boomer Lifestyle store: https://thesuperboomerlifestyle.com/ #runningwithoureyesclosed #melgreenberg #emptynest
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0:00
karen glasser live i welcome guests from
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all across the globe who entertain us
0:04
wow us and excite us so whether you're
0:07
here live
0:07
or on replay make sure you say hi in the
0:10
comments and
0:10
tell us where you are watching from
0:13
today we
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are welcoming mel greenberg go to author
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spotlight
0:18
mel a southern california native is a
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best-selling author and publisher
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her debut novel running with her eyes
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closed explores marriage life
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and love after the nest empties and so
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without further ado
0:31
welcome to the show hello
0:35
hey i'm so excited that you're on the
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show
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um we've been talking about this for a
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while and so let's
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this is mel welcome to the show and
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welcome to author spotlight this is a
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new show that we're doing we are
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spotlighting
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obviously authors um and so what i'd
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like to do is
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literally just jump right into the topic
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and that's empty nest
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um where do you go from there so this is
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your story
1:01
this story is your story so why was it
1:03
important for you to tell it
1:05
well to to the extent that i was an
1:08
empty nester
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the book itself is fiction
1:12
my journey through empty nest life and
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post
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being a full-time stay-at-home mother
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was the impetus for the story as was
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seeing friends and then people i
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interviewed
1:25
male and female going through this time
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in life and typically it was a
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50 plus there were a few younger and a
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few older
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and seeing those dramatic changes
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just started to to create so much
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interest for me
1:40
um because it was it was unexplored and
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exciting and i think
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the fact that that as we age we look at
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life differently and
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and where we are and all of a sudden you
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know the past 30 years you've had this
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this or 20 years excuse me you've had
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this beautiful
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full-time job or part-time if you're if
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you're
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maneuvering both and
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all of a sudden you lose it yeah kids
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are off to college it's your home alone
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and you look around and
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everything is different in the landscape
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the relationships everything changes
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right and there was a story to be told
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and it just sort of wrote itself
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and and when i said it was your story i
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was talking very specifically about
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empty nest and i know it's not your
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story story because
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it's got some really juicy parts in
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there
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well yeah and and it's a natural thing
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because i was going through people
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immediately thought of you know is this
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a memoir
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this you and you know every author
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injects themselves into what they write
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on some level
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and but it is absolutely a beautiful you
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know
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compilation of of life's transitions
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right right so we're you know we're if
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you're just tuning in we're talking to
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mel greenberg about her
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book running with your eyes closed with
2:54
running with our eyes closed
2:55
and we're talking about the empty nest
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i've gone through it
2:59
you've gone through it i i'm probably
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one of the few people that was
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not as devastated when we got into the
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empty nest
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i was very happy i love my kids but i
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was very happy to see them go off
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on their own and for me it was the next
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step
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um but it's interesting because not
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everybody has that feeling about
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emptiness would you agree
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i would agree and i my own personal
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experience
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i while i was not a helicopter parent
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i was very close to my children and
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there i was the ceo of the house and it
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was a full-time
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very involved position and you know
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there was just this kind
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you kind of back and go what now and it
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was was
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re revisiting what i wanted from my life
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and going back to did i return to things
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that had interested me
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right you know back out of college my
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early professional career or established
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something new and really feeling a bit
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of a loss
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so let's talk about moving forward then
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because that's what you have to do
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after the empty nest you have to
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actually move forward and you talk about
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finding your voice and direction after
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the kids leave so
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what has that been like for you what
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have you been doing
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well writing took me back to something
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number one had been a passion all my
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life then became
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a professional endeavor however not as a
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novelist so it was a fabulous new
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experience
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and and telling a story and having it
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involved in the
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and the things that have come since then
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have been incredible but
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publishing independently which was a
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very active
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decision that we made and and then being
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asked to publish other
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authors has been a great experience and
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and through that also because of the
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topic
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becoming an advocate um worldwide i've
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become a speaker and for this journey
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and midlife and who we are um primarily
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as as women but in our relationships and
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where we want to go and doing that has
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been just silver lining
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the silver lining peeled back now
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clearly you love italy right because the
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book
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takes place in in italy i love italy too
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what is it about italy is it the food
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the wine both
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the people well i honestly you know the
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to write about what you know and i
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wanted to set it somewhere
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um it felt right that the setting and
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the story that evolved
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for samantha the the main character and
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and it is in my opinion one of the most
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romantic places
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on the planet and a portion of this book
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and it is
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um a series that's book one and and this
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you know it
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it goes to their relationship and they
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are very much involved in deciding
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what's next and their
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romantic relationship which has become
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really
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a fabulous story in and of itself
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because
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typically in our age group sex
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and steaminess is you know kind of
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glossed over you know like you know
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we're not
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the hot young things in our 20s that we
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see on screen and
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story lines and you know i i sent the
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book
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to my 91 year old aunt and i let her
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know that it was a little steamy
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and just she's very cool chick and and
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she laughed and she said i'm old i'm not
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dead and that really
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resonated with me because we
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we are vital human beings and passionate
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and physical and romantic and sexual
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and so that was very much a part of
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their story and italy just feeds the
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senses
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physically emotionally you know
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nutritionally
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it was a wonderful place i do know it
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well i spend a great deal of time there
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and it fit the story and
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um i will share so all your viewers will
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get a little insight into book two
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samantha is in melbourne australia
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she does love to travel and and we get a
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sense of that
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um of her spirit and how that also plays
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into her development of
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in her character and so yeah so
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do you pick locations that you like to
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visit
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or do you just close your eyes and put
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your finger on the map
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and that's where your next you know
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location is going to be
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well these two are um places i've been i
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don't know that i would probably write
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about places i've been because
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then i have a different perspective
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right um one of the most beautiful
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things that that has come from this are
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the people you know readers that write
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to me
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and reviews that they feel like they're
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there
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that they are in italy and for those who
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haven't been there they're like oh my
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gosh i
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understand what it's like so that's
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really important to me into the
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integrity of the story
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and that comes from my own travel
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experiences
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so probably that we're talking about um
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mel's book running with our eyes closed
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um and we encourage you to go pick it up
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this is
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it's it's a it's a sexy book it's it's
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exciting
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and i think it's it touches so many
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women where they are
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right where they actually are it
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actually it does speak to me
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um i i totally loved it so we're
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encouraging go pick up a copy go look in
8:13
the comments there's a link there
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click on it not now though stick with
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the show right now and
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um go take a look at the book so
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so okay you are a prominent
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pro-age advocate i know what that is
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why don't you tell our audience what a
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pro-age advocate is
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it is someone i i support and and speak
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on
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coming are coming of age and to the
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extent that we have
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had these jobs of raising our children
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and moving on or we haven't had children
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we're all
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i just turned 61 this year and i truly
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feel my most vibrant most alive
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and there are so many topics health
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um how we eat how we live how we enjoy
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our lives physically
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emotionally spiritually and so i speak
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to those
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and and encourage women to to pursue
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passions
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and education and continue to learn how
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to move through these years
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and enjoy them have you noticed that
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there are a lot of women like us
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that are saying we are powerful we can
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do anything we want to do it doesn't
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matter if we're 60
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55 64. i turn 64 in november i'm going
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to be 65 this year
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i think that there are a lot of women
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out there that have finally
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stepped into their power and i love
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those women
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yeah i do think that's true and i think
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that there's there's a sense of
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reckoning that that you know we're this
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is not our mother's
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50 60. and we we live a very good life
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we are healthy we are making really good
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choices in what we feed our body and how
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we
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how we live and take care of ourselves
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and that's extending into these years
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and there's no reason to stop as long as
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you can keep going and the more you keep
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going it feeds itself
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the more you do the more active you are
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the more engaged you are in your life
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the more energy you have to continue
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those pursuits
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so i like to ask all my guests why they
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do what they do
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what gets you up in the morning why do
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you do it
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oh my lord um
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you know it's twofold i i love it i feel
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incredibly
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blessed that that i can do this and that
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i'm in a position to
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be writing something i love and have
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always cherished
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and and to be out meeting people and if
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that's
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that's why i do it if that's what i can
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do and if i can impact one life
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and do something positive to one person
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then it was worth getting up in the
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morning
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i love that answer who are your mentors
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do you do you have mentors that that
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have
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led you and directed you in certain ways
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i do um living you know i'm going to say
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my mom was
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my greatest mentor and she passed when i
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was 17.
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but the way that she lived her life and
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the courage and the ability to
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to go on in spite of every you know
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complication that she faced
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still sticks with me like and that
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that's what i said earlier like you keep
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getting up you keep going you put one
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put in one of the other
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and keep trying it um professionally one
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of my mentors very early on was camille
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bohannon
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and she was with npr for years and she's
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an incredible
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um news person and um
11:32
i i think that
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women who truly have found success
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and strength in their pursuits and then
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share that pass that on you know i've
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been touched by so many in different
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areas i'm very
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blessed i i am as well
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let's talk about the process of writing
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as you said you also are publishing
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other people's books so
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let's talk about how many hours a day do
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you write right now when you were
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writing the first book
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was it like you read it wrote you were
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actually writing a certain amount of
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hours every day
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or is it different now what's your
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process in writing
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i i don't have a timeline in that regard
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i don't sit down say i'm going to write
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for two hours or eight hours there are
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days that i do write
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all day long and other days that i'll
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write an hour here i try and write
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every day and i find that if i if i make
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my way to my pages
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it moves along and it keeps because it's
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very easy it's a very solitary
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endeavor and it's very easy to to put it
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off so there's you know i do at that
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voice i have to talk with her sometimes
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because it's you know
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you look for things to put it off and
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an effort
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are you a journaler i'm a journaler and
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and i do
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also morning pages so i write my three
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stream of consciousness pages every
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morning and that is a lifesaver
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i love her and i
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journal i do a lot of you know
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inconsequential writing as well as what
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i'm writing
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working on at any given time so so does
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writing
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energize you or does it exhaust you
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it energizes me i'm i communicate but i
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mean i love that i'm doing this now this
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has been this has been finding my voice
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um being out and and speaking and
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speaking in front of the public i'm i'm
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and i'm gonna say i'm shy but i i'm i i
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found
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discomfort in that space but i don't
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anymore and i think part of that
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speaks to what we were talking about
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earlier with age
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you know you kind of you get to an age
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and it's not that i don't care
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but i don't care if i make a mistake i
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know
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by this age i didn't get here without a
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lot of baggage and
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you know stumbles and falls that it's
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all good
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where you know 30 years ago i didn't
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want to make a mistake i didn't
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need to be perfect and you know that
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that impedes you in so many ways so
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um i do however i'm i find i communicate
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better in writing
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so i it's not exhausting at all it's a
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blessing
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get it out of my head so
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do you have a tip that you could share
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with up-and-coming authors that say you
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know
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i think i want to write a book but do
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you have a tip and i'm going to put you
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on solo so you can share your tip
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sure my tip is always to
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either new authors or those considering
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that
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prospect that something is speaking to
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you
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from your heart and so there's a story
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to be told and i would
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wipe away all the doubts and the
14:33
questions and just start
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write it begin tell your story and and
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don't edit yourself too much
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just let it go you know either you'll
14:42
edit it later or
14:44
a professional editor will get to work
14:46
on your work but do it
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and and get your story out there because
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it's resonating in you and it needs to
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be told
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so basically just start and you know
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it's it's funny that
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i think that goes with a lot of things
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we get we get very
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you know well i don't know if i want to
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do this so i'm just not going to do it
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we procrastinate
15:04
we would sometimes you just have to
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start
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whether it's writing a book whether it's
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anything out there
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but specifically i think writing a book
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you just have to start do you have
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an interesting writing quirk that you
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have when you write
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that somebody might say hmm why does mel
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do that
15:23
i i have to have i love classical music
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and i have baroque radio
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on pandora um and i have it on
15:31
that that suits my soul and and kind of
15:34
opens up channels for me
15:35
to to just relax and then but it doesn't
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engage me to the extent that i start
15:40
listening to lyrics
15:41
so you know it doesn't hurt my attention
15:43
too much so i i do do that but
15:45
you know i was going to say with regard
15:47
to what you just spoke of
15:49
we especially creatives have that inner
15:52
critique
15:53
that voice that tell you know kind of
15:54
that fraud voice you know
15:56
why you can't do that you're not good
15:58
enough and and it really is essential
16:00
that you quiet that voice
16:01
and move along and and
16:05
do just start we have a comment
16:08
um from kathy she says i get that me too
16:14
hi cathy thank you totally get that
16:17
totally get that so do you i we were
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talking before we came
16:22
on you asked me do you have any books
16:23
that you can recommend you know what are
16:25
you reading right now and i think i said
16:26
you i'm not reading i i'm not reading
16:29
have you read any books in quarantine um
16:32
that you might want to recommend
16:33
other than your own book which of course
16:34
we want people to go out and get is
16:36
there a book that you can recommend
16:37
that you read during quarantine i do and
16:40
again i love recommending this book it's
16:42
the rosie project
16:43
and it's the first of a trilogy and the
16:46
author is actually from
16:47
australia and it's a debut it is the
16:50
most beautifully
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witty fun it's heartbreaking
16:54
heartwarming
16:55
it's a fabulous story and i don't want
16:57
to say more than that because i really
16:58
don't want to spoil it i would encourage
17:00
everyone if you have the chance to to
17:02
give it a shot
17:03
goodbye the rosie project the rosie
17:06
project is number one
17:08
there is a trilogy so i would start
17:10
there
17:11
is that our i'm going to put it in the
17:12
comments right now is that ros
17:14
y i.e
17:18
the author is graham simpson
17:21
simpson put that right into the comments
17:24
so that when people hear this they're
17:25
going to be able to see it here
17:27
hopefully it will pop up there there it
17:28
is rosie project
17:30
all right okay we're gonna we're gonna
17:32
keep on moving because i want to know if
17:34
you have a
17:34
favorite childhood book what was the
17:37
book
17:38
that you remember maybe reading to your
17:40
own kids
17:41
um that your kids now that maybe you
17:43
read it as a child
17:45
what's that book well my favorite book
17:48
as a child
17:49
was eloise and
17:52
for some i just my mom read that to me
17:54
and i love it and i have them all and i
17:56
still love them i have two boys
17:59
and i did they weren't as enamored with
18:02
that
18:03
so i we we there's a fabulous book and
18:06
it's out of print i actually just found
18:08
some
18:09
on ebay it's called the old man in the
18:11
afternoon
18:12
cat and it is the most endearing lovely
18:15
story and
18:16
they were very close to their paternal
18:18
grandfather and
18:19
so there's a lovely tie there but that
18:21
was their favorite book
18:22
and a little prince i love that mom
18:27
my personal favorite is good night moon
18:29
and i remember
18:30
reading that book to my son every single
18:32
night and
18:33
it's interesting about anything
18:35
especially children is that when they
18:36
become
18:37
adults and they have kids they remember
18:40
those things
18:41
that sued them that they loved and i i
18:43
don't know if my if i would be blessed
18:45
with grandkids but i know that that's
18:47
my son's favorite book as well as a
18:49
child
18:50
um have do you get writer's block is
18:53
that even a thing
18:56
i tend to think writer's block is more
18:58
of
18:59
an ex for me i really do want to say
19:01
preface that because we all handle
19:03
things differently
19:04
it's more of an excuse and i
19:07
if i and there are times that i'm just
19:10
my mind's just not in it so i don't
19:12
again i don't know that that's actually
19:13
that i would qualify that as a writer's
19:15
block and if i step away
19:17
and go do something else or you know let
19:20
a couple days pass work on a completely
19:22
different project
19:22
i will come back refreshed and so i
19:25
don't think of it as writer block
19:26
writer's block i think it's sort of a d2
19:29
i'll say detour
19:30
a detour i like that it's a detour if
19:32
you're just tuning in we
19:33
are talking with mel greenberg and it's
19:36
about her book
19:38
running with her eyes closed and very
19:40
specifically
19:41
we're talking about the empty nest and
19:42
what happens when that all happens
19:45
and also how to write a book because mel
19:47
as you heard
19:48
is a publisher as well um
19:51
i want to put into the uh screen right
19:54
now let me hide this
19:55
um ways for people to get in touch with
19:58
you and then i want to talk about
20:00
something that you have going in july
20:03
um that that i know that our viewers um
20:06
are going to
20:06
want to know about and we'll tell them
20:08
how they can go and find out
20:10
more but in the meantime i'd like to let
20:13
people know how they can get in touch
20:14
with you they can go to facebook
20:16
and you're at mel media llc
20:19
they can go to facebook to a group let's
20:22
talk about this the group is called she
20:24
is it i'm a member there you go you
20:27
started this with two other wonderful
20:29
women mel
20:29
uh with mary and uh kristen what is this
20:32
group about and can anybody join
20:35
they can it is a private group and it's
20:38
a forum
20:39
and an opportunity sort of you know
20:41
think of it as an ongoing happy hour
20:42
discussion
20:44
for women 50 and over although
20:47
i hate to you know we're going to let
20:49
you in if you're under 15. but
20:51
you know our demographic and we really
20:54
we speak on every topic you can imagine
20:57
and
20:57
we have a weekly show on thursdays
21:01
called midlife unscripted
21:02
and we interview some incredible women
21:04
who have truly reinvented themselves
21:07
on on global scales and that's a lot of
21:10
fun
21:11
and because you know what midlife is
21:13
unscripted life is unscripted
21:14
and so this group is is an ongoing
21:17
conversation
21:18
about the things that we face every day
21:20
questions
21:21
we have you know different people
21:23
weighing in that are in the health
21:24
industry
21:25
and mental health physical health
21:27
spiritual health and just
21:28
everything we're going through mid life
21:31
empty nesting
21:33
empty nesting and what's wonderful about
21:35
the group it's very engaging you have a
21:37
lot of in
21:38
a lot of engagement in there a lot of
21:39
women who are in there they they respond
21:41
they comment
21:42
it's a great place to meet other women
21:44
just like us
21:45
i encourage you to go enjoy uh kathy
21:47
says she loves your energy thank you for
21:49
sharing mel
21:50
um i know kathy's gonna go look for she
21:52
is it right now oh no don't go right
21:54
now yeah don't leave them not yet
21:58
um you are also on instagram at
22:01
uh g-berg which stands for
22:04
greenberger and you have a website that
22:07
people can find out everything else that
22:08
you do
22:09
at mailmediallc.com you publish
22:12
um you've got a lot of different things
22:14
going on in your world which just tells
22:16
us
22:16
it doesn't matter how old you are you
22:19
can do anything you set your mind to i'm
22:21
passionate about this
22:22
and that's the message that that is the
22:26
message um somebody hide this
22:30
so any last
22:33
minute oh i promised we would talk about
22:35
this okay in july
22:37
yes what's happening in july going to
22:40
italy
22:40
of course where else would i be going
22:43
the minute i can travel
22:44
um i'm doing i'm appearing as a guest
22:47
author
22:48
for a women's retreat um with kathy camp
22:51
and she's on instagram
22:53
you can find her at living agelessly and
22:57
it's a seven day retreat july 10th
22:59
through the 17th in sicily
23:01
and savoring sicily savoring the senses
23:05
and i will be hosting journaling
23:07
workshop
23:08
and and really it's a way of i'll be
23:11
speaking about journaling
23:12
as a way of working through whatever it
23:14
is i mean we just we're still in the
23:15
midst of it but we're coming through
23:17
you know a life-altering global pandemic
23:20
and
23:21
you know the mental aspect of what that
23:24
looks like and how that has processed
23:26
within each of us is profound and and
23:28
writing about it is one way
23:30
to help it out of you and the
23:33
yoga dining will be experiencing the
23:37
foods and wines
23:38
of sicily and it's a you know we got we
23:41
talked about it
23:42
and coco the traveler the tour operator
23:45
in paris is we you know eventually we're
23:48
all going to be wanting to
23:50
travel and what did we want how did we
23:52
want to approach that
23:54
right as it starts to happen and as
23:56
everyone's vaccinated and we're feeling
23:58
safe and secure to make this trip
24:00
we really felt that this was a blessed
24:02
way to
24:04
to welcome back the world like welcome
24:06
back life
24:07
and get together with women and and it's
24:10
very
24:10
it's a fabulous villa and it's large and
24:12
it's co you know safe distancing and
24:14
everything every
24:15
measure has been put into place and i'm
24:17
really honored that they asked me to be
24:18
a part of it i'm really excited
24:20
oh my gosh it's so exciting if you guys
24:22
are interested in finding out more about
24:23
it say
24:24
italy in the comments and we will make
24:26
sure to come back
24:27
and let you know about the trip and how
24:30
you can take advantage of it um
24:32
in case you guys didn't know because i i
24:34
haven't been broadcasting this
24:36
anywhere i'm kidding we are now on
24:39
the roku channel how cool is
24:43
that um i'm gonna put this here we go
24:47
um so you can go check out karen glasser
24:49
live on the roku channel
24:51
and but wait there's more we're also on
24:54
amazon fire
24:55
um you can go check out amazon fire as i
24:57
like to say we
24:59
are everywhere well maybe not everywhere
25:01
but we're almost everywhere
25:04
almost the work work in progress and
25:07
that is that is we're a work in progress
25:10
mel i want to thank you for taking time
25:12
out of your day to spend time with
25:14
us and our audience any last-minute tips
25:16
any last-minute thoughts that you'd like
25:17
to share with the audience before we say
25:19
goodbye
25:20
well i want to thank you karen for
25:21
having me and for everyone out there all
25:23
your
25:23
your fans and and your viewers um
25:26
you know where you can reach me on and
25:28
i'd be happy to
25:30
answer any questions you might have you
25:31
know message me privately
25:33
love the conversation um just you know
25:36
what life is a work in progress
25:38
and just go for it and keep believing in
25:41
your passions and your dreams because
25:43
i'm living proof that you can make it
25:46
through anything i i hear you on that i
25:50
hear you on that i want to thank
25:51
all of our viewers for tuning in whether
25:54
it's live or on replay we don't care
25:56
we just love you anyways i want to thank
25:58
you because we know that you have a
26:00
choice
26:00
as to where you spend your time and you
26:03
chose to spend it with us today
26:04
so go out and give somebody an awesome
26:07
day and we'll see you next time
26:09
on the next
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