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Going Grey On Purpose with Ben Winkler
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Jul 18, 2019
On this episode of The Super Boomer Lifestyle Caren and Ben Winkler talk about learning how to enhance your natural beauty. We are celebrating the mature evolved woman when all of society is focused on the never ending youth. Photographer Ben Winkler and his Faces of Silver world tour is about going grey, silver or white on purpose along with whatever stage of life you are in. He seeks to introduce beauty and sex appeal in the conversation around women over 50. #benwinkler #facesofsilver #greyonpurpose Check out more shows here: http://www.carenglasser.live. Follow us on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/carenglasser Follow us on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/carenglasserlive Follow us on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/carenglasser Visit The Super Boomer Lifestyle store: https://thesuperboomerlifestyle.com/ My Direct Links, Programs & Equipment I use for my Shows & Promotion: BeLive: http://bit.ly/3p7E0DB Get Your Book In Front Of Thousands of Potential Buyers! https://bit.ly/2HJ38Qu Logitech HD Pro Webcam: https://amzn.to/362BuXP Wired Earbuds with Microphone: http://amzn.to/3p1pmOi Lavalier Lapel Microphone: http://amzn.to/3p9EFVo Blue Yeti USB Mic: https://amzn.to/395hExi ATR2100-USB Cardioid Dynamic Microphone: http://amzn.to/3qzEy5A
View Video Transcript
0:01
but tog refer Ben Winkler and I go undercover and discover what lies beneath as we celebrate the evolved
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woman on today's super boomer lifestyle show the super boomer lifestyle show
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will enhance your lifestyle health empowerment and more hello everyone
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karen Glasser here and welcome to the show this is going to be an amazing show
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today it's season for the premiere episode so here we go we're going to get ready to go live if you're here on
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replay make sure you comment down below because we will make sure to comment
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right back and if you have a question if you have something that you want to share we want to hear about it if you're
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here life even better make sure to comment below and we'll put your comments right up on the screen star in
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a spotlight on you all right my guest today is photographer Ben Winkler his
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face is a silver the world Tertre is about going great silver and white on
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purpose imagine that on purpose along with whatever stage of life that you're in I'm really excited to welcome to the
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show today as we discover what lies beneath and celebrate the evolved woman
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so Ben welcome to the show thank you so much for having me I'm delighted that
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you're here we're gonna be talking about a lot of different things but I like to start my show with and actually a question and that is what defines a
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super boomer so I'm going to actually go first and then I'm gonna throw it over to you I say that super boomers are not
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defined by their age they're defined by how they show up in life get rid of that
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word age Ben how do you define a super boomer well that have an issue with this
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age thing to begin with I mean age is a natural thing it's always been around it's never been that popular and talked
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about as it is today what is it today that's that with all technology and this
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lifestyle and the society that we have we have this gift of not giving up it's
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like hoot anymore you know I have the great honor I have to tone it down a bit
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but it's really about your bucket lists it's about like what do you always want to do finally the
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kids are out of the house you're empty nesters the kids are off to college out of college you get the grandkids whenever you want or for babysitting
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days and the rest of the time what do you want to do with your so-called second act and that's that's really what
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I bring it down to like do the things that when you're under their family deathbed in the last few minutes when
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you say I wish I would have done XYZ yeah all right today exactly and I call
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it your next next so I'm always talking about what am I gonna do next so if
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you're listening right now you're on life tell us how you define a super boomer put it on into the comments and you
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never know I might pop it right up on the on the screen so we're gonna jump right in today we're
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celebrating the evolved woman and you talk a lot about your mission is to
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celebrate the mature evolved woman when all of society is focused on the never ending youth and you know it was funny
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when I read this when you sent this to me the first thing that I said was Oh mature I don't I don't know if I'm
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actually mature I might be older but I'm not sure I'm mature so let's talk a little bit about that what do you mean
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by that when you talk about the mature woman is it it's you just said it's not age so how would you define the mature
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woman I think it is when we when we first sit down and say you know what I'm
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looking back at my life what have I accomplished and the whole the whole family aspect my my career and so on as
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a woman and first now I have the ability to look at it differently to take a step
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back and not be in that 24/7 with kids and job and husband and everything anymore now you can sit back and say
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okay what what do I want to do what's what is the the definition of who I am
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you know it's it that's what it really comes down to I think I I so totally
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resonate with what you're saying you know your your past few years you've been focusing on photo projects that
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that actually seek to introduce beauty and sex appeal into the conversation around women over 50 and one of the
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projects that you have worked on that was actually brought me to you and that you actually brought you to me and I saw
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your photos I've seen you I've been following you actually I think I've been stalking you on Instagram and I've been watching
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these photographs that you have put up and it's called the faces of silver let's talk about that where did that
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come from it's obviously a passion of yours and I'm gonna show some images as you're
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talking about it okay I have to go way back to start for that I think in
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general I was I've always been shooting mid-life enough women mid-life enough this is just a big response this is just
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what's worth response to my work we did another test the other day between men and women silver head man silver had
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women it's a minut percent presented person tile person - yep percentage
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Valerius let's call it percentage out of out of what the response is for women so if I
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go all the way back it's it used to be women midlife and up and then at some
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point somebody said well you're photographing all these great women like it was only a handful of it and I didn't
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really notice it I didn't really see the difference and so I set back I was
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thinking about it I found all these while back then there weren't that many civic groups or gray groups that was
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grazed a new blonde and all those and there's really great work I mean like they are excellent as a support system
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and then I said you know what if I go all the way back my I must have been 13
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14 or something and my mother had had always had a big coffee shop in in Austria like the Viennese type with
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mahogany and marble and like people sit there and just watch everybody it's a pastime it's a social thing and this one
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time I'm sitting I'm standing there and there are three guys sitting at the bar and my mother is behind the bar and she
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walks into the kitchen my mother as long as I remember has always been great only
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once she turned I don't know 40 or 35 there maybe 40 or something she started coloring it into black so it wasn't
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reverse so these guys are sitting there my mother walks into the kitchen and one of these guys says
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well if she's gray up here what do you think she's down there and I'm sitting
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there like ah which lets my hormones you like want to defend the honor of your
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mother and whatever nothing ever happens but I just fought at that point how do
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we have the audacity to judge I tell other people what they should look like what they what how they have to behave
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how they have to dress like you know at this stage in life what does that mean oh my god we're doing an end or
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different section so now you've turned 35 do you think I still can wear a bikini are going oh yeah okay what is
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this well you know what and if you were to go google right now what to wear after 40 X 50 there's gonna be literally
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thousands of articles that are gonna tell us what we should and what we shouldn't do we were talking about my
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story right before we went live and the fact that my mother also was white for as long as I remember when she turned 30
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she went white and when I turned 30 I started turning white nice and huh not doing that because we didn't have a Ben
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Winkler then we didn't trust somebody in in the field telling us it's okay and in
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fact I started coloring my hair and anyone that knows me people that have been watching the show for Four Seasons
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for several years now you saw my hair grow out originally the show was called
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the little white lie and I sat here week after week saying okay it's time for the reveal guys remember that I put my head
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down and now here I am all silver and gray and what I told Ben was if I had to
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do it all over again I would have done it so much earlier do you get that from other women I get that more and more I
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mean a few years ago just two three years ago it was a lot a lot different it was a lot harder and now it's not
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that it has gone mainstream but people accept it more because of these groups that are around on social media social media is really a great help I always
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say silver is just a I call it sale because people call it grey I mean a there are like how many shades of how
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many different shades of grey haired women have you seen I mean there's anything from color don't you steal to so many different shades and it's just
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another color and when I oftentimes when I look at at people's pages when they post
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before-and-after thoughts ago before you were just blending in I would not have noticed you of course I'm tired because
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I work with it and I enjoy it and now you're sticking out your your phages your your facial features your eyes
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everything gets gets highlighted even more you know your your bone structure and everything at least I'm biased but I
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enjoy bringing that out I mean really what is beauty beauty's individuality it
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is it absolutely so the biggest challenge I had been is a as I was going gray was what to do with it because it
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was turning yellow it was like what a mess and and those are the things that you don't even understand or even know
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about until you start doing this so one of the things that people would say well how are you making your hair turn beautifully silver without the yellow
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and without the brown so one of the products that I use guys you can see it up on the screen I use something called blonde uh it's purple guys it's actually
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purple shampoo it smells like blueberries and grapes and you put it on your hair and I
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actually have a picture of me standing there with my hair it looks like a big huge mask or not a mask a hat of purple
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and I'm not sure maybe you're I mean you're the artist I don't know what purple does with with silver to kind of
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tone it down is that an art thing in general right just gives it a more
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bluish hue and do you take that you take the yellow out but my question is if we have all those photographs up here and
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you just described this so perfectly why don't we see a shot of that so I'm gonna end with the purple mask I I should know
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what I'm gonna you got me there I actually am going to show that not today but I will show it I
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think that the person that I have on the screen here is actually Yasmina is that correct can you see her here yes and Jasmina the
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reason why I'm putting her up here particularly she's one of the beautiful models but she's also a photographer herself and she is the one who took your picture
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the one that I've been using in all of the promotions and I wanted to give her a shout out for that reason because all
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of us who are in this creative field we sometimes don't get our name shouted out and somebody borrows our work and I
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don't want to be that person and that is why I'm giving her a shout out right now because she's phenomenal in the picture
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she did for you but she's phenomenal herself she herself is absolutely gorgeous I want to run
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through some of these I know that you can see them do you have any stories on any of these that you want to share
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these are they're all different people here what do you probably see it from the
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get-go is that I have a love for black and white I'm old school like no matter of T that like the black room tastes the
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dark room taste and I think black and white just features the subject more or
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highlights what we really want to show with these most of them I wanted to
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portray especially the black and white ones a moody you know a different viewpoint than the regular frontal on or the
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regular headshot kind of creates a mood greed some drama shows some of their
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features like this one that you have up right now amazing lady from New York what struck me when I saw it was her
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tattoo on her wrist that's coffee that coffee cup i think is or see of bangle i
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want to see your coffee cup and i want to see your bone structure she's got this amazing bones returning stunning
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and that's what we came up with you know each each and every one has something
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different and i'm trying to find that and highlight that so how do people find you I mean if if somebody like me or
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someone else who's growing their hair out and now they have silver hair and they are empowered and and because we
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talked about this I think it's actually the reverse those of us who have done this and of seeing what's happened we're empowered we show up in a way that says
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don't mess with me don't tell me what to do I like the way I look so when people
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approach you and say I would like to hire you and I want to do a photo shoot do they get shy I mean what happens how
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does how do they get to you and how does that session actually go so in general I
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would say out of all the women I've photographed about 5% that models the
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rest 95% are regular and read a housewife's business women whatever mothers when
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they show up the old terrified my neck if they have not they're like okay and
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if in the first 20 minutes or so it's just you know the whole thing turns around I always tell them well the first 20 shots the filters
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50 shots is just okay I'm testing my lighting I'm seeing how what are your features what are your a better sight
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what is what is the better side it's 1:00 and live in 20 shots 20 minutes
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something like that they are they are down to as relaxed as could be and we're just having a blast for the rest of the
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session I love that those of you who are watching live right now and even on replay if you have silver hair white
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hair gray hair whatever you want to call it let us know and tell us what it has been like to show up in the world with
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your hair the way it is and showing up powerfully I mean I watched one of the pro aged woman I think her name is Mary
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Mary she's gonna be on the show in a couple of weeks Shane it has these amazing fatah you know photographs out
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there of women who are actually of a certain age but us it's it's us the empowered super boomers and these women
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are phenomenal and I think that there is a transition right now in our media
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there are more and more of us would you agree that are coming out and saying look at me I think it's not just working
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out in this particular cases there's more to silver but in general overall there's more of this ages and movement
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or whatever anti-aging whatever everybody calls it something else don't get me started on anti-aging because what the heck is that what does that
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mean and then you're taking current and you're taking creams facial creams and
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and hair shampoos and whatever and you put it on a 20 year old and tell me how a gray-haired lady should go and what
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eat what she should look like and what you should use how how does that make sense now I lost my thread what was that
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silver haired ladies we're showing up now there's more of us who are doing this and yes ageism it's it's that age
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in particular I think with if we go 20 years back 50 years back you would
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rather have been boxed in within your community your family your great grand
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or family around you and if you would have to follow okay what did your mother your grandmother and so on do whereas
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today we have all these impacts from from the outside world like support groups different there are so many
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groups around who who who basically proposed a different way
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of looking at your second act if I will like how do you define it how we
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redefining us what is what who are you actually because you're not anymore who you used to be when you when you set out
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at 25 with small kids you know so now is the first time that you have this grand opportunity right it's me blank canvas
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what do you want to do with it define Deena just said I'm 10 months
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into my hair transition journey and feel empowered and free go Deena that's awesome yes that's awesome and
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that's really what it's about and I think more and more we see this and one of the things that you say you showcase women at this age that still have it
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their radiant their sensual their sexy and you're celebrating the female form I
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know that as I get older you know I look in the mirror sometimes and I'll say hmm I don't don't look the way I used to
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look and it used to be painful it used to be painful to look at myself and say oh you know and I'm fortunate I
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don't have a lot of wrinkles I'm very fortunate but but even that one wrinkle or the to wrinkle or or the you know
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it's I'm sagging somewhere or the jet whatever it is we start to get very very
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critical right about who and what we look like we need people like you Ben and the people that are in the industry
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that are telling us look at yourself with love you are beautiful right I
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think our first problem is the way we have been raised in the last 50 years of
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media with all these products we have been told what we should look like what our colors are on Vanity Fair or
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whatever magazine has been throughout the ages this is the ideal right you
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have to be 20 pounds heavy or 20 pounds light because you're not allowed to eat you have to have that haircut you have
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to wear this you can't wear a bikini after age 35 all that stuff what what
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really got a does us in every time is comparison we are not making anymore we
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are not celebrating we believe that either beauty is in the outside you became there because of the
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media because of all that because of the movies when I see this more and more now with with some call it metaphysical
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metaphysics the called a new age whatever with all these different ways of thinking about in life
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and what else is out there you know like right not just that that old-school good old boy structured thing we we want to
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rebel against things we want to question things it's about time than that we question both the system the attitudes
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society's new point societies and norms who makes the norms it's us who makes the norms plus baby boomers order the
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second-act demographic we had to pick a spending power in the country yes yet we
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don't even speak up when it comes to stuff like L'Oreal recently doing a giving out an ad where they said we
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declare 2019 the year of the graph the gray hair color and then they took a 20
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year old artificially color their gray and put it out there are you freaking kidding me are you so ridiculous you and
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I talked about Cindy Joseph may she rest in peace she she epitomizes for me she epitomizes
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what this whole movement is about she was pretty much at the forefront she's that she's a was a makeup artist she you
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know did the makeup of some of the most beautiful models in the world and when
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she turned 48 and decided I'm not going to pretend that I'm something else she's
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kind of I did the same thing she did she let her hair go white and wouldn't you know it she's walking down the street in
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New York and she gets picked up by one of the top agents and ends up modeling for Dolce Gabanna and then became one of
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the top silver haired models and I think she set the stage you talked about
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cosmetics she talked about the creams and the lotions that's her that was her whole thing boom cosmetics you don't need to put all
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that crap on your face let let the real you you know shine through what does the
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real you you know we we think we are defined by everybody else again I said this before beauty is not on the outside
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look I look back look back at our grandmothers yes we as kids did not look
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at them compare them especially back in the day when it when it was not about 20 million creams and what you should look
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like with social media today and all the influencers and millennial influencers who know it all correct and who are all
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the new instant models and if Instagram is consumer what are you don't get me started with this
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you know if you don't have anything to contribute that is of substance take yourself out of the equation you're not that important contribute something it's
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not that how many how many followers you have and how good of an influence New York like when you are 20 years old and
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you call yourself a life coach I'm sort of questioning that yeah and I would not
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be first in line to go you know get those services fresh for sure let's
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let's just go you know I want to ask you do you have a tip that you'd like to share with all of our viewers and I know
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you talked about there's only one you so you want to expand on that let's let's let everyone and I before I do that Dina
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wants you to know that she's gonna be seeing you in July in North Carolina she's excited to work with you so she's
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one of your face right she's gonna be one of your models even more apparently she well yes I heard about that I heard I heard about that she that is supposed
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to play take place in what is that July Carolina there you go there you go
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I'm all over the place this year is just a little crazy
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what who are you what's your personality why don't you bring that up like our
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grandmother says I just touched on when we were little kids we looked at them and we were in awe of what a maybe not
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back then we thought what a wise woman she is maybe she was not all that wise that he could call herself as or her
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peers or whatever but for us she was that now it's it's this first time that
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we that we in in history where we can sit back and say there Who am I you know
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I don't have to follow the norm I don't have to dress like everybody else like what is fashion everybody thinks fashion
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and beauty is I have to do what Kardashian what the Kardashians are telling I forbid when your own do your
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own thing and don't go crazy like the next thing that I just don't understand is when they have nothing to contribute
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anymore now they are dressing up boys they look like girls where's the haircuts and everything on the on the catwalks and the girls like boys ago and
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your point is what exactly what are they really you don't even know anymore what you put on and
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what are we teaching our kids you know we had Elodie what what what's your priya personality there's only one
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of you there's only one of each and every one of us and don't be scared that you don't have enough to contribute or
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that you're not that you're not enough you've got a whole story at this stage in life well that story and hone it well
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and I've also heard that you know that it's true that we all think that everybody else is looking at us and so
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we do things based upon they must be thinking this or this or this rather than what you are saying it comes from
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within and the reality is is really nobody's looking at you they're looking at they're busy worrying wondering what
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people are saying about them right so so what you're saying is actually the smart
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way to do this actually is to not worry about what other people say go within and show up as who you believe you are
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and and and express your your abilities and what you contribute to society I
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mean there is so many when it comes to fashion or to individuality let's start with the dress on let's start with
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colors what are your colors that you enjoy don't go like okay some of there's a lot of people out there right now who
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can I hate me but I'm just gonna tell you what I think that's why I'm here more what do you wanna wear and if this
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is pink or screaming blue or whatever and somebody says you cannot combine this with that you know what at this
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stage in life watch me those are my words Ben they I say watch me and Joey
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Garrity who's on the show right now and she talks a lot about that she talks about showing up in your own your
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visibility watch me show up so that the spotlight is on you and express yourself
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and and do that and be there and be that person I am sure people are wondering
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right now how they might be able to get on your calendar possibly you were
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telling me that you're you're doing a lot of traveling you're gonna be down in San Diego which I'm excited about because that's where I am and then
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you're going to North Kerala going to North Carolina you're gonna be all over the place so first of all I'm gonna put
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some of your contact information up but I didn't put an email or anything like that is that if they go to your website
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which happens to make this the website is always the easiest there's a link there to contact us and
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we take it from there we get back to you from them I think this has got to be one of the most in the immediate way the
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easiest way this way it's just my name it's been wink accom if they remember that you're good to go and it's actually
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on the screen right now guys Ben Winkler calm if you want to follow Ben on Instagram which I suggest you do because
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he puts a lot of amazing images up there you want to go to Ben underscore Winkler
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underscore photography and after if you want to go to Twitter and follow him
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over there it's been Winkler photo and then finally if you go over to Facebook
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he has a page there as well it's been Winkler - photography - ink period and
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when you and I there's a bunch of other numbers but I actually tested this Ben if they put that into the search your
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page will show up if you just put my name into it it shows up - there you go you know what just put Ben just put bit
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in and he'll be there and I want to do a quick shout out here it's it might look
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like a one-man operation but I've got people helping me with my social media I have - this is great shout out for all
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the ones that are helping me it's I couldn't do this by myself four phases of silver for all my social media for
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everybody does something and it's a whole team effort and I just want to feature that here so oh my gosh
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then if you if it was possible you just I like you even more because of what you
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just did you're a we we talk about being a we this is about all of us being together you shout it out somebody else
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you start this spotlight on them visibility and you are doing you are actually showing people how they should
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how they really should show up and that is to put the spotlight on others because when you do that the spotlight
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shines right back on you I have a question for you any last-minute thoughts anything that you want to make
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sure that people walk away from this show whether on live or on replay where they say number one that guy is amazing
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I need to contact him I want to get involved with him and number two this is going to help me show up better in life
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because of these things that I have learned on the show today is there anything that you want to add well the
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first thing is I don't want people to mistake that I'm for only photographing your silver only gray hair
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do we do women midlife and up and midlife could be anything from 40 45 50 you know everybody I just don't want to
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go down to 20 or to school for photography there's there's no substance there's nothing to contribute nothing to
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appreciate for me you have another project scars oh do I ever I always have
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another talk about scars so you know what we've got a little bit of time let's do this I I don't want to get off of the show until we really have
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explored everything about Ben Winkler tell us a little bit about scars I just love the name of that by the way scars
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came around came about again it's the same demographic again and there are I
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wanna again my my work is always about beauty always about beauty mid-life
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enough so it's not only the outside that we have its the scars that we have and
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the the all the issues that and psychological issues that on the stories that come with them the stories of
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triumph the stories of suffering and so on I want to make this a project where
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it's not gonna be the same to the same extent of the same scope as faces of silver faces of silver took me for two
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years around the world that was on several continents I was like all over the place I want to narrow it down want
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to bring one maybe four for each category it could be anything from from c-sections to hip replacements to to
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breast cancer to fire ROI to order the most amazing scars most amazing I don't
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want to call them weird some people call them weird because we think scars are not normal yeah if we look at them as a
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piece of you as a part as part of you and as a celebration that you're still around that you made it then they're
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beautiful thing that's the only we have to set up now is we are painting our
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makeup artist paints the scars in gold in gold cover along that theme of King
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the Japanese art form Kim Soo be where you take a vessel like you drop this and you break it and then you fuse it back
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together with gold and you make it something more something new something of value it doesn't decree a decrease in
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value and that's what I want to show with that project wow that's amazing Barry Selby says that's the path be
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authentic and stand in your truth and actually Thank You Barry Barry and I go way back Carole actually put up your
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male she's one of your apparently you're one of your brand ambassadors for faces of silver she means motivated them she
29:00
is doing a lot of my work for four phases of so she's she's been instrumental over the years Thank You
29:06
Carol well shout out for Carol that that is awesome Ben I want to thank you for taking time because clearly you're busy you're all
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over the place I want to thank you for taking time to be on the show today and and actually on the premiere show of
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season four I think this is a great way to start out the new season I totally appreciate who you are and and
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what you are doing in the world and I I really hope that we stay in touch I'm actually considering I maybe I need to
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connect with you and maybe do a photo shoot you can find me if I can find you
29:35
we're gonna be in San Diego it might just have to hunt you down this weekend huh sounds great I'm gonna drop you into
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the green room we're gonna do our super boomer moment and we're gonna say goodbye to everyone in just a minute
29:46
you're gonna go down into the lobby so bye-bye thank you so is is he amazing or what he's amazing
29:56
I I was when I started watching him on Instagram and seeing the photos that were there and seeing the reactions from
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the women that he's photographed my first thought was I want to be one of those women my second thought was I want
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to bring him on the show because you really epitomize everything that super boomers are all about so as I like to do
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on a super vulnerable and I like to talk about something that stuck out in this conversation that I will take back with
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me and and one of the things that you talked about was from the inside that we
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really it's about the insight it's not the outside and that really struck home with me is that if we show up when we
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show up not if when we show up with our inside beauty showing we can't help but
30:40
be beautiful Oh completely beautiful I want to thank you for sharing that with
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us because I think it's important I think it's important for all of us to show up and to show up in our and as who
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we are authentic authentically I'm having trouble talking authentically and
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and as who you really are in your truth as Barry said so thank you thank you thank you for for being on the show
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today and I want to thank the viewers you guys have a choice you have choice as to how you spend your time and
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you chose to spend it with Ben and I today and I want to thank you for that because I know that we're all very very
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busy so whether you're watching this live if you're watching this on replay I want to thank you for taking time to
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share your time with us so go out and give somebody an awesome day and we're
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gonna see you next week on the next episode of the super boomer lifestyle show goodbye everyone
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