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The Ovarian Chronicles with Cat Williford
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Nov 5, 2020
Caren goes live with Cat Williford, author of The Ovarian Chronicles on this episode of Caren Glasser LIVE! Pick up a copy of the book here: https://amzn.to/2V9jXr3 Her book is a cautionary tale for women globally to take responsibility for your health and your dreams. No one else will do it for you. Check out more shows here: http://www.carenglasser.tv Follow us on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/carenglasser Follow us on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/carenglasserlive Follow us on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/carenglasser Visit The Super Boomer Lifestyle store: https://thesuperboomerlifestyle.com/ 📌 Subscribe to Channel: https://YouTube.com/cgmusc #theovarianchronicles #catwilliford #bestinterviewswithauthors #authenticity
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0:00
i welcome guests from all across the
0:02
globe who entertain us
0:03
wow us and excite us and i
0:06
am very very excited about our guest
0:09
today so whether you're here live or on
0:11
replay
0:11
doesn't matter we love you make sure you
0:13
say hi in the comments
0:15
today i am welcome welcoming kat
0:18
williford to the show
0:19
and we are talking about her new book
0:21
the ovarian chronicles
0:23
kat is an internationally renowned coach
0:25
speaker and author for women since 1994.
0:29
she has held the coaching profession's
0:31
highest credential of master certified
0:33
coach
0:33
since 1980 1998 and has trained over 13
0:38
000 coaches internationally that's a lot
0:40
of coaches
0:42
a born and bred texan cat's willingness
0:45
to tell it straight as a shot of tequila
0:47
as part of her charm that's part of why
0:48
i like her so much
0:50
today this modern-day goddess lives on
0:52
the beach in ventura california where
0:54
she delights in moonlight sparkles
0:56
on the ocean so without further ado we
0:58
bring cat
0:59
into the show
1:04
that's a lot of coaches that's a lot of
1:07
coaches i've been doing it for a long
1:08
time
1:11
that's just a lot of coaches a lot of
1:14
coaches
1:15
and it's my thrill actually to to to
1:17
support them on their journey it's my
1:19
thrill to support anyone on their
1:20
journey
1:21
well and you know i've i've said money
1:23
many times you're my coach
1:24
and you know you're you're really good
1:27
at what you do
1:28
i i am sure that all the coaches that
1:30
you've trained
1:31
um have taken what you do so well and
1:34
now
1:35
are able to impart that on their on
1:37
their
1:38
clients and their and their people as
1:40
well which gives you i'm sure a lot of
1:42
joy
1:42
um no your book the ovarian chronicles
1:46
tells your story of how you lost sight
1:48
of navigating your future so the first
1:50
question i really want to ask you is
1:51
where did that title come from
1:54
well uh it came from the fact that it
1:57
was
1:58
i mean i think we women are kind of
2:00
ruled by this thing called our ovaries i
2:02
have been you know
2:03
and they seem to dictate so much and
2:07
i was in the gynecologist's office when
2:10
this book's like the first sentence is
2:12
me
2:13
perhaps i'm like at the gynecologist's
2:15
office hearing what no woman wants to
2:18
hear
2:19
in her lifetime and so when i was
2:22
journaling about this i was like all
2:23
right in my journal
2:24
this is the ovarian chronicles and then
2:27
i realized this is a book
2:29
it's a book and it's stuck it's very
2:31
catchy the title's catchy
2:33
um and and i i was curious as to where
2:36
where that actually is so that's a great
2:38
story um
2:40
so taking responsibility for your health
2:42
and dreams is a prevalent theme
2:44
in the ovarian chronicles is there a
2:46
specific event
2:47
or events that led to that discovery was
2:50
that you
2:50
sitting in the stirrups well it was me
2:53
sitting in the stirrups and it was me
2:55
20 20 years before that
2:58
with a mystery illness that people
3:01
couldn't quite figure out
3:03
nobody was talking about candida when i
3:06
had systemic candida
3:08
in my 20s yeah lucky me
3:11
but that really is that moment where um
3:15
i started in our i started down the
3:17
alternative holistic healing path
3:20
um having grown up a surgeon's father i
3:23
was steeped in the miracles of western
3:25
medicine
3:26
but they were getting me nowhere and so
3:28
this really
3:29
you know i had to take responsibility
3:32
for my body at that point and
3:34
really with the dream piece i had
3:38
let that drift for my dream for children
3:41
and and i was in a beautiful
3:44
relationship for many many years
3:46
and finally after oh a long time many
3:49
years like 16 and a half years he
3:51
finally said
3:52
no not no not now
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but no with the parent record and i
3:58
realized i had
3:59
abdicated taken responsibility for my
4:03
dream i had been
4:04
really supporting his dreams and so
4:07
i want to take a stand here and say hey
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girl
4:10
we gotta put our big girl panties on and
4:14
and we gotta take some action for
4:16
ourselves
4:17
oh my gosh i i like i just love that you
4:20
know you talk about
4:21
body wisdom so what the heck does body
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wisdom mean
4:25
yeah what does that mean it's something
4:28
is your body smart what does that mean
4:30
i think my body is way smarter than this
4:32
will ever
4:33
be seriously so i developed
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uh what i consider a very powerful
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relationship with my body and that's
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part of my work is supporting women to
4:45
stop the hatred of their body
4:48
i mean we're mostly at war with our body
4:50
we deride ourselves we
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you know when i noticed like even last
4:55
year i was kind of laughing at what
4:56
menopause was doing to my body and i you
4:59
know like oh the minnow pod and this and
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that and
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all of a sudden you know in february i'm
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like i can't fit in any of my clothes i
5:07
am taking charge here
5:08
and i was talking to my body i'm like
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what do you want here and it's like i
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don't want to
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i want to be strong again i want to be
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healthy again so i feel like
5:18
wisdom for not just our body can come
5:21
through our body but i literally i will
5:23
put my hands on my heart center and i'll
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just
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close my eyes and say hey there and by
5:28
the way i've named
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the relationship like the entity of my
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body i call her olympia
5:36
she's
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strong olympia is strong she's an
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olympian
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she's from greece i'm all about the
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goddesses
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i love it people came to me and so i'm
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in relationship with my body and i talk
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to her
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and i listen to what she has to say like
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sometimes she's like
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just chill out
5:58
so you know you talk about survival
6:00
skills
6:02
specifically hope became a survival
6:06
skill for you so what would you say to
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others yeah
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you know when i developed that skill
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i was at a very vulnerable
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painful time in my life my father had my
6:19
kidney in him and he was dying
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and over a six-month journey
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and you can't get through six months of
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being by someone's bedside
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unless you craft hope so hope let me
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survive that now
6:38
outside of that kind of circumstance
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hope as a survival strategy
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is not always going to get us what we
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want we have to take responsibility for
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those choices we have to speak out loud
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what we
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want we can't just assume people are
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mind readers
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and we can't just assume that because
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our body is in good health in this
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moment
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right and our fertility will continue to
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last
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so interesting so interesting so
7:09
if you're just tuning in we're talking
7:11
to kat williford uh the author of
7:13
this amazing book that is not quite out
7:15
right this second but it will be out and
7:17
this is if you're watching this six
7:18
months from now a year from now
7:20
or whatever you're going to be able to
7:22
go pick up the book so before we move
7:24
any
7:24
farther into this i want to actually put
7:26
the book um
7:28
into the into the post here so that
7:30
people can see this i'm going to put
7:32
this right
7:33
um in the big screen and you're going to
7:35
notice
7:36
in the comments guys you're going to
7:37
actually see um a link that you're going
7:40
to be able to click on
7:41
um that will take you over to um
7:44
cat's page because it's as i said it's
7:47
not quite older what are they going to
7:48
find there when they click on that link
7:51
so what you're going to find is you can
7:52
find out some more about the book but
7:54
you're also going to have the
7:55
opportunity
7:56
i love giving things away one of my
7:59
favorite things to do is give things to
8:01
people
8:02
so i've created some bonuses here for
8:04
those who
8:05
want to play i'm going to do a community
8:08
zoom jam
8:09
is what i'm calling um the week the book
8:12
comes out
8:13
and so if you want to find out when the
8:15
book comes out get that direct link and
8:16
how to get on that i'm
8:18
also offering my decode
8:21
your body's messages for love health and
8:24
happiness program it's a hundred dollar
8:26
value
8:27
it's a workbook with some meditations
8:29
and guided visualizations
8:31
it is powerful medicine y'all i am
8:34
offering this as a bonus
8:35
to come into the fold come and play and
8:38
really be in this conversation
8:40
of for women by women for women it's
8:43
just
8:43
it's going to be powerful so the what
8:45
they'll have what will happen is once
8:47
they
8:47
once the book is live they're going to
8:48
be able to go buy the book and you'll be
8:50
instructions on how to go
8:52
access all of those bonus things that's
8:54
pretty cool
8:55
so you say it's time for the great
8:58
unmasking first of all i love that it's
9:00
just a great title it's great for
9:02
for all of us internet marketers it's a
9:04
great
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searching title what does that mean
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though what does it mean that we're
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unmasking ourselves
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well part of what i learned through my
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ovarian chronicle journey
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was i was identifying the masks that i
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had been wearing that allowed me to stay
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in this kind of
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uncomfortable comfort zone right
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and so one of them was the fairy tale
9:29
fine mask how many of us pretend things
9:30
are okay when they're not
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because to actually not means we have to
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say
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something and do something differently
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so sometimes we're just not ready for
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that
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right right old times i'm wearing the
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chief operating officer of control mask
9:44
[Music]
9:45
not me i'm a control freak oh yes
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yes
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that's right and you know or we wear the
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suck it up buttercup mask like okay
9:57
it'll be my turn
9:58
someday let me just help this person get
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what they need and want
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oh there's so many masks we wear it's
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exhausting and the truth is
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they were born out of necessity
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right and they were our psyches were
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smart to build them the
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the problem becomes when we forget we're
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wearing them and we start interacting
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that way
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all the time so the unmasking is about
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hey y'all let's
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get real because if we can get real with
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ourselves
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and those we love and be and honor
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what's true for us
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we can then actually start to build
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those dreams we want to be living into
10:33
we can change that storyline
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right and start living the one we want
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to be living
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and and that's so powerful i mean that
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if we can do that
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i think that that's obviously a game
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changer it's it's life-altering when we
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can do that
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um put a pen in your hand and start
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writing that story from
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how it could be exactly and maybe
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turn it into a book you know might even
10:59
want to turn it into a book
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um you say that it that your memoir this
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is your memoir
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it's considered a cautionary tale first
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of all i love
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i love the words that you use and i love
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how you
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um describe things differently than most
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people that i've had the pleasure of
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meeting
11:16
so when you say it's a cautionary tale
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what are you cautionary
11:20
what are you cautioning women about what
11:23
do you want them to learn from your
11:25
example that's great so there's two
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things the first thing is
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i want to caution the younger women
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if hope is your strategy for getting
11:38
pregnant later in life
11:40
wake up right because i wish somebody
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handed me that cup of coffee
11:45
right and said sweetheart if this is
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what you
11:48
want you make your stand now
11:52
now i waited till i was 41.
11:56
mistake so i'm a cautionary tale and and
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listen i'm healthy my grandmother gave
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birth to my father and she was 43 in
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1933
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so like i was counting on that longevity
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right um so don't count on things that
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are not provable like you know
12:16
you know i want to i want to ask and i
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don't know if this is too personal
12:20
when when you when you
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realized that it was it was over it was
12:25
done and you're not going to be able to
12:27
do this in your cautionary tale
12:29
what were the the the emotions that you
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went through i mean how did you
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deal with that that's it that's a huge
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esp
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for women women you know you talk you
12:37
talk violent talk and we talk about
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you're going to have kids and legacy and
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you're going to
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what did that do to you when you were
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well it's interesting because i was
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really still wanting to get pregnant
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when this ovarian diagnosis came my way
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and that's another reason this i had to
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title this book this
12:57
you know the american chronicles and
13:02
i continued honestly with a little bit
13:04
of hope as a strategy
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um coping mechanism and survival skill
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there but really what happened was over
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like once i was out of the crisis of
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like the health
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scare um i was really looking at
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what i was putting myself through to
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keep
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my hope alive and to keep my fertility
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going for as long as i could
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and what i recognized was
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and i've spoken with many women about
13:32
this since
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how challenging it is to grieve
13:39
something that has never been
13:42
so interesting
13:45
so believing this thing that i never had
13:49
but
13:49
it makes you feel cuckoo yeah there's
13:52
nobody to bury
13:54
there's no urn of ashes
13:57
so this grief doesn't have something
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tangible to it and it makes you
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feel cuckoo uh at least it made me feel
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cuckoo
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i was questioning myself constantly
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around
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my uh deservingness
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to actually grieve this pain until i
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woke up and
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well of course you deserve to grieve
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this pain right right
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you're grieving so then it was about the
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grief and letting go and i think grief
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is so
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as painful as it is it is so healthy
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to let ourselves move on and so for me
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it was it was exhuming all of the
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the coulda woulda shoulda's exhuming the
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great wants
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and really releasing them and not
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letting them stay
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stuck in my heart or
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your stuff all the different shoppers
14:55
putting your dream on hold obviously
14:57
builds pressure and regret right
14:58
and eventually something breaks
15:00
something causes a change
15:02
what was that tipping point it was that
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the tipping point at that point at that
15:06
specific time or did something else
15:08
happen
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um it was so no something else that
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happened
15:13
um in my relationship prior and
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um i write about it in the book we had
15:19
just gone through a big
15:22
you know with life my grandmother died
15:25
his grandfather died
15:27
a big big business deal went
15:30
you know i was gone overnight and we got
15:33
out from underneath a really big house
15:35
sold it just in time and we were
15:36
relaxing but he couldn't sit still it
15:38
was all about this other thing and i'm
15:40
like
15:41
what about us i saw the right i was like
15:45
it will never
15:46
be about us now i just want to say i'm
15:49
not here to make him wrong
15:51
i still love him
15:54
but at that moment it was like i can't
15:58
keep doing this or i'm gonna turn into
16:00
somebody i don't
16:02
want to be so you took care of yourself
16:04
which is important i think that's a
16:05
great message for
16:07
women everywhere men too but you know
16:09
let's face it we're talking about
16:11
ovarian
16:12
chronic right so women need to take care
16:15
of themselves sometimes they need to
16:17
learn the beauty of the word no
16:20
it's a beautiful word no a long time to
16:23
learn that word
16:24
but and it can be a complete sentence we
16:28
don't have to justify it and that's what
16:30
i really
16:30
have been doing i've been trying to
16:32
justify right
16:34
you know like any way i could still stay
16:36
in this relationship again
16:37
i love this man right right but i saw
16:41
wow it's never gonna be this thing that
16:43
i needed to be
16:44
right it wasn't good for you at that
16:46
point it was not
16:48
and point you have to own those things
16:50
and it's painful
16:51
and there's growth there so
16:55
you teach a lot about authenticity that
16:58
that is you have these beautiful cards
17:00
you have
17:00
you do a lot of stuff with authenticity
17:03
and in fact you have your signature
17:04
program which is called the authenticity
17:06
advantage
17:07
where you help women unmask their own
17:09
stories their vulnerabilities their
17:11
heartiness
17:12
um i've actually gone to events that
17:14
you've done i've created
17:15
mass i mean we've done all of this stuff
17:18
tell us a little bit about the program
17:20
and and i understand that when they go
17:22
to your website and give them your
17:23
website a little bit
17:25
they can actually go access this to see
17:26
what it's all about but a little bit
17:28
about the authenticity advantage
17:30
you know i think my entire coaching has
17:34
been built around
17:36
supporting women to become their
17:38
authentic selves
17:40
to strip away those things that
17:43
they are not right you know the world
17:46
loves to tell us who we are
17:48
um when we were growing up we were told
17:50
who we are
17:52
at a certain point those things no
17:54
longer fit
17:56
but we keep trying to fit into them
17:59
right
18:00
and that's what i began to notice with
18:02
so many of the women i was coaching and
18:04
myself like what is it i'm trying to fit
18:06
into
18:06
because i you know i feel you know i'm a
18:09
five foot seven woman i kept feeling
18:11
like i was trying to put on you know
18:13
petite pants or something and they were
18:14
up in my knees so
18:16
i was like i don't fit this mold and all
18:18
of my clients were saying similar things
18:21
and that's really when i got we have to
18:23
strip down
18:25
all these old assumptions about
18:27
ourselves that have been layered on
18:30
some of them have come through
18:31
experience but most of them were
18:33
outside in i
18:37
hey i hear you you know you know my
18:39
story
18:40
you totally know my story i mean sitting
18:42
in front of a camera and doing
18:43
live stream for years since then i mean
18:46
forever
18:46
yeah i also talk about being
18:48
like your authentic self and in fact my
18:50
earlier shows were all about that and i
18:52
would look in the mirror and i'd say
18:54
my hair is pitch black it is not
18:57
i'm not being authentic and so i totally
19:00
understand but i didn't i didn't
19:02
understand what it was doing to me
19:04
until i let the hair grow out
19:08
and i did it on camera and it changed
19:10
the trajectory of my career
19:12
definitely because i showed myself as
19:14
vulnerable and i think
19:16
i think there's a connection you can
19:17
tell me yeah or
19:19
between vulnerability and authenticity
19:21
absolutely and
19:22
i think one reason we see people not
19:25
acting
19:26
and behaving authentically is they're
19:28
afraid to be vulnerable
19:30
right i love to say my greatest strength
19:35
is my vulnerability because when i can
19:38
be
19:38
and and even if you start with yourself
19:40
like here's a tip
19:41
you don't have to go and like here i am
19:44
world and you know be naked
19:45
with your heart wide open when you've
19:47
not ever done this before
19:49
start with yourself and it to me it's
19:51
just telling ourselves the truth like
19:53
there was a truth you told yourself in
19:55
that moment
19:56
if i'm correct is that it
20:00
absolutely absolutely i don't know about
20:02
you
20:03
though though in these last six months
20:05
of
20:06
coronavirus and coveted being locked in
20:09
the house
20:09
i have found myself becoming even more
20:12
authentic that i am finding that
20:15
especially with my family
20:17
that i'm able to share my feelings that
20:19
i've never ever
20:21
ever been able to share um because we're
20:24
in a we're in a different world
20:26
right and i i don't even believe in the
20:28
new normal or any of that
20:29
i don't there is no such thing as a new
20:31
normal there's no such thing as we're
20:32
going back to a normal
20:34
we just live in a different time right
20:36
now and
20:37
it's changed the way i show up so as
20:39
much as this was a
20:41
a physical a visual look at me being
20:44
vulnerable
20:45
i now talk about how i feel
20:48
so i don't it's an age thing well
20:52
iris thing i don't know you know i
20:56
i think what i see happening here is it
20:59
is a
20:59
shift in dynamic so there's been a
21:03
shift in dynamic of how we relate to
21:06
people
21:07
right in terms of so much
21:11
here now you know on video
21:14
on screen versus right here
21:18
right and interestingly enough
21:21
i have seen in when we're getting
21:24
vulnerable
21:25
here like this little bubble of
21:27
protection right
21:29
in terms of we're not out in the world
21:32
we're not in a group setting
21:34
um so here
21:37
we're more apt to be a little more
21:39
vulnerable
21:41
but it's translating out there people
21:43
are becoming more vulnerable
21:44
and truth-telling in their personal
21:48
relationships
21:49
yeah it's it's been it's changed it's
21:51
changed my whole dynamic with my family
21:54
i mean and it's like they don't know
21:56
what's happened to me all of a sudden
21:57
i'm
21:58
just i'm sharing which is which is
22:01
not usual for me but it feels so good
22:04
well but it's it's the i think it's your
22:06
evolution right you it started with your
22:08
show when your hair was growing out and
22:11
you know just all the different things
22:13
you've been doing to grow and stretch
22:15
become more authentic right showing up
22:18
and i think that's
22:19
what i see happening that excites me is
22:22
that
22:22
i think there's a great hunger for this
22:25
out there
22:26
for all of us to find that path of more
22:29
authenticity
22:30
right and and if we even take that big
22:33
word
22:34
out of it i think it's a longing to be
22:37
known
22:39
yes and yes i agree i i agree
22:43
uh masks we talked about earlier yeah
22:46
keep people from knowing us
22:48
right i feel known now i my family now
22:51
knows me
22:52
um which they didn't before and it's so
22:54
it's so interesting and it feels
22:56
good it feels good so i think this is
22:59
really important
23:00
if you're wondering how to find out more
23:01
about uh the program
23:03
and you i i encourage you to go over to
23:05
kat williford.com you're going to find
23:07
all sorts of
23:08
really great information there in
23:10
including um
23:11
the the way to get to opt-in so that you
23:13
find out when the book is out there
23:15
and you i know you have some free gifts
23:17
there as well on the site that have
23:18
nothing to do with the book so
23:20
um i encourage people to go over there
23:22
we also encourage people to go follow
23:24
you on facebook now this is your
23:26
facebook page
23:27
so if you type in the search engine on
23:29
facebook
23:30
authenticity advantage woman series
23:33
the page is going to show up now you
23:35
also have a group
23:36
of which i'm a member and um and it's
23:39
great there's a lot of conversation back
23:41
and forth and a lot of people that are
23:42
just
23:43
being there they're themselves they're
23:46
vulnerable self so go and check it out
23:48
at
23:49
the sisterhood circle advantage put it
23:51
in the search engine and it will show up
23:53
now you also have a pinterest account i
23:55
love it you're all over the place
23:56
so go into pinterest and type the words
23:59
kat williford
24:00
and you will show up there pinterest is
24:01
so much fun i love it because it's very
24:03
women-centric
24:04
and and we're talking women stuff you
24:06
know and you're also can be found
24:08
on uh linkedin again just put in cat
24:11
with lulaford and you will
24:12
you will show up we've been talking to
24:14
kat williford about her new book that is
24:16
coming out um i just want to put this up
24:19
here one more time
24:20
um the the link is in the comments i
24:23
want to make sure you click on it so
24:24
that you can
24:25
get the notifications from cat when it's
24:28
time to go purchase
24:30
the book and get all the freebie bonuses
24:33
freebie bonuses you've got some really
24:36
cool stuff but i was about to say a bad
24:37
word
24:38
cold i'm not going to say that
24:41
you got a lot of cool stuff that's going
24:43
on over there any last
24:45
um comments thoughts that you want to
24:47
share with our audience i can't believe
24:48
i mean this time has gone by really
24:50
really fast
24:52
what else do would you like to share if
24:53
there's anything to the audience
24:56
you know there is something i want to
24:58
share and it's really
25:00
um i think we're in a great moment here
25:03
where we get to choose
25:07
and invite us all to choose from that
25:10
authentic place inside of us and not
25:13
the one that wants is afraid of things
25:16
like choose from your heart
25:18
not from your fear and one last thing
25:21
you know i
25:22
you know i've got this show called your
25:24
heroine's journey and i would love
25:25
anyone to come and play
25:27
oh yes thank you i'm so sorry i didn't
25:28
say that now they can find that
25:30
on your facebook page
25:33
it's on the author it lives on the
25:35
authenticity advantage facebook page
25:37
that's right
25:37
on this one yeah and you do you do a
25:41
show every couple of weeks right
25:43
every other tuesday yes and you had a
25:45
really cool guest on your show
25:46
yesterday which i go on over there and
25:49
click on online and tell you who it is
25:51
i want you to go over there and click on
25:53
it and
25:54
watch the show guys we really appreciate
25:58
you know that you're here with us today
25:59
or even on replay because you have a
26:01
choice as
26:02
how to spend your time and we are
26:03
bombarded all the time with all sorts of
26:05
stuff and you chose to spend it with us
26:07
we hope that you'll follow um that you
26:09
follow karen glasser
26:11
uh you can go follow me on my website
26:13
karenglasser.live
26:14
which is where all the shows live um and
26:17
also
26:17
the blog post to go along with it i'm on
26:19
instagram you can go follow me on
26:21
instagram at karen glasser
26:23
at karen glasser imagine that you can
26:25
follow me on twitter
26:26
at karen glasser and
26:29
on facebook you can follow me there at
26:32
karen glasser
26:33
live where you can follow us on the
26:36
shows and everything
26:37
thank you cat thank you for sharing your
26:40
expertise sharing your thoughts
26:42
sharing your vulnerabilities sharing
26:44
sharing everything and especially
26:46
sharing
26:46
the book ovarian chronicles i had a
26:49
chance to read some of it already
26:51
it's a wonderful book it's it grabs you
26:53
it pulls you in because it's very much
26:56
it it touches you it touches your heart
26:59
it
27:00
you see yourself in it you say yourself
27:01
as a woman the struggles that we go
27:03
through so i want to thank you for that
27:05
um and i encourage everyone to join us
27:07
next time next week on the next episode
27:10
of
27:10
karen glasser live goodbye everyone
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#Women's Health
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